Your brain’s buffering. Your inbox is feral. Your calendar just sent a “quick sync” invite and you briefly considered faking your own disappearance. This sticker understands you on a spiritual (and slightly unhinged) level.
This holographic die‑cut sticker pairs clean, minimal aesthetics with maximum emotional chaos. The phrase “Mentally I’m Offline” hits with the force of your third coffee and the quiet dread of realizing you’ve been staring at the same email for 12 minutes. It’s perfect for anyone who’s booked, busy, and spiritually bankrupt — yet somehow still showing up to life like a reanimated corporate corpse.
Stick it on your laptop, water bottle, planner, or journal — anywhere you need a sparkly reminder that surviving is a vibe and spiraling is practically a lifestyle.
🎁 Great For
• Zoom/Teams fatigue survivors who’ve perfected the dead‑eyed nod
• Burnt‑out creatives who sparkle under pressure and cry in Canva
• Students who live in the library and occasionally scream into the void
• Anyone who’s Googled “how to disappear professionally” more than once
⭐ Product Features
• 🌈 Holographic finish reflects light and existential dread with flair
• 🌱 Eco‑solvent inks — bold colors with a low‑impact footprint
• ☀️ UV‑protective laminate keeps your dumpster fire vibrant for 5+ years
• 💧 Water‑resistant vinyl that's built to survive spills, storms, and emotional breakdowns
• 🫰 Easy‑peel backing because your brain has enough tabs open already
🧼 Care Instructions
Wipe gently with a soft, dry cloth — like brushing away the ashes of your latest meltdown with whatever dignity remains. Start from the center and work outward, avoiding harsh cleaners, water, and unsolicited advice. This sticker is already doing its best to stay upright in this economy.
